Comparative Religion

It seems a natural instinct to measure success by comparing ourselves to others. Swami Prabhupada once met the Chief Executive of the Dai Nippon printing company based in Japan. He asked him what his goal in life was. Without saying a word, the tycoon reached for a stack of business cards of all his acquaintances. He then carefully removed his own personal card from the bottom of the stack and proceeded to slam it on top of the pile. He smiled at the Swami. The message was loud and clear. Often, this competitive desire to “be the best” can carry over into our divine pursuit. We mentally create a spiritual CV and proceed to judge our success based on the achievements, recognition and respect that we can build up within our spiritual circle. Admittedly, we often find security, reassurance and self-worth in feeling ourselves to be better than others.

Unfortunately, such a mentality actually stifles personal growth, damages relationships and ultimately leaves us feeling empty and dissatisfied. When we measure ourselves as “better” than others we develop pride and complacency. We cement ourselves in an illusory picture of our progress far beyond where we are really at. Furthermore, when we see others excel and surpass us it can feel threatening and discouraging. It dents our ego. A wisdom teacher once said: “more difficult than feeling sorry in someone else’s suffering, is to feel genuinely happy in someone else’s success.”

In actuality, there is no need to compare. Everyone has been divinely endowed with distinctive abilities. As we learn to complement each other’s unique personalities and cooperate to bring out the best in one another, then everyone can simultaneously advance in their spiritual journey. Everyone in an orchestra has an important part to play. The role that each instrumentalist plays, however, is not as important as the final musical composition. In the same way, the measure of our spiritual success is not in the external achievements and the recognition that we gain along the journey, but rather in the internal development of purity and selflessness that we are ultimately striving for. Rather than comparing with others, let us compare with ourselves so that we can constantly improve, develop and refine the content of our character.

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Split personality

Many of us on the spiritual path lead double lives. Carefully avoiding the image of an over-zealous religious nerd, we sometimes end up hiding our spirituality and even compromising our principles so we fit into the crowd. Initially, people may appreciate the added spiritual dimension to life, but when one’s interest grows, commitment deepens and priorities begin to change, that’s when the alarm bells start to ring. Parents are happy with the morality and principles that the practice of spirituality brings, but later they fear you may become too detached from the world, lose your drive for success and renounce your duties towards the family. Friends think it’s cool and funky to ’think deeper’, but later they complain that you’ve changed and how your company no longer stimulates them. How do we balance our spiritual journey with our worldly relationships? Is it possible to maintain your principles without becoming a social recluse?

In the second chapter of the Bhagavad-gita Krishna explains that “what is night for all beings is the time of awakening for the self-controlled; and the time of awakening for all beings is night for the introspective sage.” Once, when asked what the purport of this statement was, Srila Prabhupada replied “they think you are crazy and you think they are crazy!” Materialists look at spiritualists and pity what they see as a conservative life of self denial and childish fairytale. Spiritualists look at materialists and lament their illusory pursuits for pleasure, foreseeing the frustration that comes from seeking substance in the shadow. Everyone has their own take on life. I guess the most important thing for a spiritualist is to come to terms with who they really are. There comes a point when you realize that life is too short to put up false pretences and masks. If you’re not comfortable with yourself, we can't really expect anyone else to be.

Interestingly, as a spiritualist matures, he is not only unaffected by the scepticism of others, but by his conviction and inspiration he can often influence and transform those very same people. Going to a deeper level, we realize we have lots in common with others. Everyone, despite their aspirations and goals in life are all actually looking for the same things – peace, love, achievement, relationships, security etc. The only difference is that we are all looking in different places. In this way, a spiritualist need not see himself as a black sheep, standing out like a sore thumb in society. Rather they can be likened to a drop of red ink thrown into a pool of water. By boldly taking the plunge and confidently expressing themselves, they will colourfully enrich the lives of everyone around them.

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Mr Motivator

In his paper "A theory of motivation", Abraham Maslow outlined the famous “Hierarchy of Needs" model. He explained that individuals are driven to pursue various things in life. However, only when basic needs are met can one begin to focus on higher pursuits. The climax of one's journey is “Self Actualisation” - the most satisfying and fulfilling state of human existence. At that stage one recognizes their purpose, their meaning, their inner-calling and their true identity.

The "Hierarchy of Needs" starts with the most basic necessities of human existence. We require food, clothing and shelter for our survival, and until we have them it’s difficult to contemplate anything else.  Once we have acquired those items, the next stage is to strive for security and safety in that position. Thereafter, the individual pursues emotional fulfilment through relationships, family, community and a meaningful bond with other people. They seek to share their life experiences with others. Beyond that, one focuses on boosting their esteem through achievements, distinction and recognition in their social circle. After someone realises these four objectives, Maslow posited the final goal to be “self actualization.” At this stage, the individual aims to discover the true meaning of life. They dig a little deeper, and search out the more profound meaning behind their existence. According to Maslow only 2% of the world’s population get anywhere near this stage.

In the Bhagavad-gita, Krishna explains that “out of many thousands of people, one may endeavour for spiritual perfection, and out of those who have attained such perfection, only a rare few actually reawaken their personal connection with the Supreme Truth.” We look for happiness on many levels; through our bodily faculties, through emotional comfort and through intelligence and ego. Maslow’s first four levels deal with these external coverings. However, all such attempts at happiness do not touch the essence of our being. Beyond the body, the mind, and the intelligence, is the spirit soul. Thus, only spiritual food can really satisfy us. To understand this and realign our daily priorities accordingly is real self-actualisation.

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Stepping Forward

Recently I witnessed a gruesome car crash right in front of my eyes. Two drivers collided at full-speed, while another car careered off the motorway flipping over three times in the process. Within minutes there were dozens of police, ambulances and fire-engines. It reminded me how life sometimes changes its course in such sudden ways. We’ve all experienced those surreal and dreamlike moments – a car accident, the death of a loved one, a misfortune or some unexpected news. In a few short moments, everything seems to have changed. Our plans fly out the window, and we’re left completely disorientated. What next? As the reality of the situation dawns, the natural reaction is one of anger and frustration.

Once, Mahatma Gandhi and a friend jostled their way into to a crowded Indian carriage. As the train departed, Gandhi suddenly looked down and realised he only had one slipper on. He and his friend peered out the doorway and saw the other slipper lying on the platform and disappearing out of sight. Gandhi simply smiled. He then took off his slipper and hurled it down the platform, where it perfectly met its pair. He offered an explanation to his bemused friend – “keeping the slipper would have frustrated me, and whoever had found that other slipper would have been similarly annoyed. Now I can forget the incident and move on, and someone else can benefit from some free footwear!” There are two very important lessons to learn. Whenever we face some reversal in life, we have to come to a level of acceptance as soon as possible. Secondly, we have to move forward with positivity, optimism and progressiveness, making the best of the situation.

Easy on paper, hard in practice. I know. But what other choice do we have? Accepting the plans of providence liberates us. You don’t have to fight an inner battle any more. It’s futile to invest excessive emotional resource in that which is never going to change. Furthermore, the acceptance should give birth to an attitude of embracing challenges. As they say, you can’t direct the wind, but you can adjust the sails of your life. We must learn the art of finding opportunities in every situation. Beyond physical and emotional pain, the Bhagavad-gita explains that we are indestructible spiritual beings, empowered and equipped to face anything. As we become rooted in the eternal wisdom of the ‘greater purpose’, we become more and more aware that this life is just one chapter in a much longer story. It’s a chapter which inevitably has numerous twists and turns, and doesn’t always turn out the way we expect. 

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